Hi all,
I’m working with a therapist and I’m struggling with some of the advice she’s given me and so looking for more data to either come back and chat with her about or continue the conversation
So I talk to my mom multiple times a day. It’s usually when I’m driving to do an errand, when she’s on her way home from work and I’m mindlessly doing chores. Overall it’s just to chat, about all the things going on.
We do suffer from some boundary issues - like during planning for my wedding she invited my cousin to stay at our house without asking (ultimately told her that can’t happen again, and I got the typical boomer response “I was just doing the right thing” kinda response.)
My therapist is urging me very directly that we need to get down to chatting once a week. This feels impossible to me. I am an only child to a single mother where I shared a bedroom with her until I was 13 due to financial issues. She was 24 when we had me, and we’ve both had some big glow ups where we’re both financially stable, responsible, etc etc. Her and I were always together - I ultimately was blessed with a scholarship to go to boarding school at 13 and so after that I just lived with her over the summers until I moved away at 23.
I live a 4 hour flight away from her right now, and am looking to start a family soon with my husband.
Growing up with my grandmother and aunts a few minutes down the street made me know how important it is to have a village when raising children.
So of course, there’s a whole other conversation going on with my husband about if we want to urge her to move to the same state as us (if she wants to) which makes me think talking to her everyday isn’t that weird? Especially if she moved here?
Anyways, I know of course this isn’t even close to the full story - but just curious if talking to your mom once a week is really that common (my husband does for example, but I always chalked that up to him being a dude not a “healthy boundary” thing)
And another question stemming up while I’m typing - what does a healthy village look like?
